Writer's Workshop: 5 things

Mama Kat's Writer's Workshop

I have not participated in quite a while, and thought this would be a good way to get back into the swing of blogging regularly again!

5 Things You Don't Know About Me

1. I'm not a natural blonde. Not even an unnatural blonde anymore. (Maybe I should rethink my blog title?)

2. I'm in no real hurry to go back to college. I rather enjoy NOT having the stress. (I quit....errr...took a break last fall to have Tristan....and now to be with him the first few years.)

3. I can read a 500 page book in a day. I read really, really fast. I have had to quit buying books because I go through them so fast that I'd spend a small fortune every month.

4. I'm currently on a cleaning strike. I refuse to be the only one cleaning up after 5 people. Especially when all but one of those 5 are capable of cleaning up after themselves and pitching in around the house. I'm about to go postal because no one is taking a hint. Or listening when I flat out say "I am not cleaning anything else until you all start pitching in."

5. I'm a smoker. I have smoked on and off since I was 15 years old, which was 15 years ago. I've quit a handful of times, but seem to always pick it back up when stress gets to be bad. I don't plan on quitting any time soon. Well, hopefully soon, but right now I have no desire to quit. (and I do NOT smoke in my house or around my kids)

5 Things I'm Knowledgeable About

1. Crocheting. Even though I just got back into it a year ago, I've become quite good at it. And have learned a LOT about it.

2. Art. It's my passion. My true calling. And something I wish I could make a living at.

3. Procrastination. Yep. Do I need to say more?

4. Interpreting Tristan's babbling. No one else understands what he's saying, but I do. Most of the time.

5. How to purchase a weeks worth of groceries for $35 WITHOUT using coupons. (just did this last weekend....the last week of the month is always tight!)

5 Things I Know Nothing About

1. Quantum Physics

2. The reason behind teenage attitude problems

3. Sewing. I've had several people try to teach me, but I just. can't. get. it.

4. Why my ex-husband is such an (idiot, low-life, asshole, POS, etc, etc, etc). Or how he can treat my kids the way he does.

5. Getting a one year old to quit climbing.

5 Things I Believe

1. I believe in God. And Jesus. And I love them.

2. Children are our future and should be treated as such. All the violence towards and killing of children by the people that were supposed to keep them safe has made me so sad and heartbroken.

3. International Delights Almond Joy coffee creamer is like heaven in a cup. Seriously. It's like drinking a candy bar.

4. All my kids are the best looking kids EVER!

5. I'm probably the most awesome person you'll ever know. :)

FINALLY!!

The semester from hell is OVER!

I finished up my last final exam today and am SO relieved to have this craptastic semester over with!

I'm really hoping for a C in my Spanish class because I don't want to take it again. I know I got a big fat F in my English class. I know I have a B in my Curriculum/Management/Assessment education class and am pretty sure I'll have an A in my Cultural and Linguistic Pluralism class!

So that is a tenative A, B, C, and F on my transcript for this semester!

I am so glad that I have a good 7-8 month break now to get ready for baby and to spend time with baby after s/he is born! I need it right now. I'm so burned out on college! (which makes sense since I've been going NON-STOP since fall 2004!!)

Major FAIL!

Yep, I am going to have a major fail on my hands soon.

I am going to FAIL my English class this semester. I thought I could do it at the beginning of the semester, so I stayed in the class (when I should have dropped it and picked another class). But now that the semester is winding down I know that I'm going to fail.

No doubt in my mind about it. I just can't write a 10 page paper on something I don't understand. I do not understand Transcendentalist Literature, so I cannot write about it. Especially not 10 pages worth! This paper is 55% of my total grade....so you can see why I say that I'm going to fail.

This will be the first time I have EVER, IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE, failed a class. *sigh*

Oh, well. I gave it a shot. It's not my fault I'm not an English major taking a graduate course. (BTW, this class I'm going to fail is a mix class....it is a graduate/undergrad class and the instructor teaches it and assigns stuff geared to the graduate students...not the undergrads....I'm an undergrad.)

Been MIA And Going To Be MIA More

I've been MIA for a while and have only made short posts lately. Sorry. Real life has been occupying my time and school is winding down for the semester, which means the work gets piled on.

Just a few updates:

1. Baby is still doing wonderfully. I'm feeling more human and less tired. Baby is getting stronger and I'm feeling more and more flutters. Can't wait for B. to feel them too!

2. Little J. was tested for the gifted program at school and blew the test out of the water. They have to have an IQ of 130 to get into gifted and he has an IQ of 153. He is on a waiting list for a Program for Exceptionally Gifted children and will get into that as soon as a slot opens up. Oh, yeah and if you didn't already know...Little J. is 6 and in Kindergarten....so this is a BIG deal! He is at least one to two grade levels above Kindergarten level in EVERYTHING. We are so proud!!

3. Big J. is POSSIBLY going to be moving back with his mom for good. We cannot homeschool him another year and know that when we put him back into public school that he will fall into old habits and we just can't do it anymore (we've been doing it for the past 3 years with the crap with school....since his mom decided she didn't want him at her house because he couldn't behave at school). There are more options for school where his mom lives, so we feel that is the better place for him to go for a fresh start. And we honestly cannot keep having our entire lives revolve around him. We have other children in the house that are not getting to do the things they want to and do not get near the attention that they need because we have to focus so much on Big J. and his "issues". His mom SAYS she wants him to move back, Big J says he wants to move back, so we are going to let it happen. IF it ever happens. She wants to try small visits, then longer visits, then longer visits before she decides whether he can move up there or not. I know what I'm saying is harsh, but Big J is 15 years old and it is time he started to act like it. We are moving to a "tough love" approach with him. He knows the rules and our expectations...if he chooses to not follow them or chooses to break school rules or the law, then he will face the consequences of his actions on his own with no back up from us. We've backed him up and helped him out and it does NO GOOD, so now he has to learn the hard way since he seems to not learn the easy way. OK, enough of that...moving on...

4. I have decided to take some time off of college to have the baby. I plan on a year, but will go back next January if I need to (which I very well might). If I go back in January, it will be only for a class or two and will be a light load. I will start back full time in the Fall of 2011 and will graduate May 2012. I want time to enjoy the baby as a newborn and want to have as much breast-feeding time as I can get!

5. Diva D. will be choosing her classes for middle school soon. She is my oldest biological child, so this is a really SAD time for me. My baby is growing up!

6. Smarty-Pants C. is also going into middle school next year. Seems like just yesterday he was the size of Little J.!! He came down for his Spring Break last week and we had a blast hanging out! Going to miss him, since we won't see him again until July!

7. There was something else that I was going to put here, but I got distracted by a question from Little J. and completely forgot....guess it wasn't all that important if pregnant brain ate it!! lol

Well, I will be done with this semester the second week in May, so plan to not see me around much in the mean time. After that....who knows!!! I'll have some time on my hands for sure since school won't be occupying a TON of my time!!

Happy Birthday.....

TO ME!!!!!!!!!! I am 29 today!

Not doing much today for my big day. I told B. that all I wanted for my birthday was to go see Alice in Wonderland and we did that on Sunday with Big J. (since his birthday is coming up on Saturday).

I don't need fancy gifts, I have this:

And this:
What more do I need?!?!?

"Interesting" Award

Trudy over at Third Time's a Charm gave me a new award! This award requires you to list 7 interesting things about yourself and tag 7 other blogs for this award! I've been racking my brain trying to think of 7 NEW things that you all do not know about me that are interesting and I think I have it.

1.

I played 3 different instruments in school. I played the flute in the beginning and continued to play that as my primary instrument, then in 7th grade I began to learn the bassoon, and then my Junior year of High School I played the bass drum in marching band. I was also able to pick up almost any instrument and play with only a little guidance about what to do. Yes, I was a band geek, but I was a band geek when being a band geek was cool!

2.

I am terrified of moths. I mean TERRIFIED. Like running away, screaming like a little girl terrified. Don't know why. Just am. It is an irrational fear that I can't seem to shake. Although, I am better about it now. Now, if there is a moth around, I just close my eyes and make someone else get rid of it (most of the time Brilliant B. gets stuck with that task!).

3.

My ultimate goal in life is to become an Art Professor at a college. As much as I love children and I love teaching them, I want to teach adults to draw and paint and sculpt. I want to spend my days drawing and painting and sculpting. And I want to have my own studio at my house. I want to be able to tell people, when they ask what I do for a living, that I am an artist and an Art professor.

4.

I can read a 700 page book in one day. It takes me about 2 minutes to read an entire page. And I can tell you what I just read, too. I can read fast and retain the information. I love being able to do this. It makes my homework go by REALLY fast!

5.

I really want to have an IQ test done on myself. I am curious what my actual IQ is. I know I have an above average intelligence, but I want to know exactly how much above average it really is. And yes, I do believe that I am smarter than a lot of people. Hell, I believe that I am smarter than a lot of the instructors I've had in college. Some of them are just MORONS! But I do not convey this belief to everyone and I don't try to prove how smart I am to others. So, I'm not one of those smarty pants people that like to rub it in.

6.

If we could financially afford to, I would have kid after kid (shhhhh, don't tell Brilliant B.). I love children and really would just take as many as the good Lord gave us. But, alas, we would not be able to financially support a lot of children so, I'm going to settle with one or two more. I want two more, Brilliant B. only wants one more. We'll have the "one more" discussion after we finally get pregnant with our first together. I think, though, that 6 is a nice round number....much better than 5!!

7.

I'm a bit of a push-over and I hate it. But I always try to see the good in people and usually end up giving way too many chances. Hence why I stuck with a man for 5 years of pure hell when I should have left after I first learned of his drug use. I do not let my kids see the push-over side of me because I know they would jump on that and try and use it to their advantage (they are all too smart for their own good!). With them I stay consistent. It's just with other adults that I seem to be a big time push-over. It is something I have been working on stopping some. My EX is making it really easy to get practice in on NOT being a push-over.

Now here are the blogs that I'm tagging:

Crystal (my sis) at Just My Musings

Myda at Confessions of a Southern (Liberal) Belle

TMVM at The Scattered Mind of a Tattooed Minivan Mom

Susan at Praying For a Miracle

Tanya at Journey To A Miracle

Jenners at Life With A Little One And More

Tesa at 2 Wired 2 Tired

Writer's Workshop: 100th Post and a Broken Heart

It's that time again! Time for Writer's Workshop from Mama Kat! (just click on the nifty little pic up there to go see her!)

I haven't done one in a while and figured I'd make my 100th post a special one!

Here are the prompts:

1.) Time for your tangent…what is your latest complaint?

2.) If you could have given yourself a snapshot five years ago of what your life is like now, what would the picture be of and how do you think you would have felt about it?

3.) What’s in YOUR name? What does it mean? Why was it given to you? etc..

4.) Write a letter to the first person who ever broke your heart.

5.) Welcome to the most shocking rose ceremony in writing prompt history. Please award roses to the ten people (or items) in your life that you’d like to continue pursuing a relationship with.

I figure since this is a special post....My 100th post...that I'd get a little deep and go for the letter to the first person who ever broke your heart.

Now, I've felt heartbroken before this, but this was truly the first time my heart was broken bad. And it is to my piece of shit ex-husband. Enjoy. (this is not going to be a rant...just read...you'll be surprised!)

Dear POS,

First off, I would like to thank you. Thank you for all you put me through. Not what you expected to hear from me? I thought not.

Thank you for forcing me to be a stronger person. Without the beatings, the hatred you showed me, the cheating, the worry, the fights, and the general lack of caring on your part; I would have never known exactly how strong I could be. I know now. I'm stronger than you know. I'm stronger than you, but you've figured that part out over the last 4 years, now haven't you?

Thank you for forcing me to become EXTREMELY good with money. Without knowing when we would have money to buy food and pay for a roof over our head; I learned how to shop for a lot of food for just a little money. I also learned what it was like to go hungry so that your children can eat. Thank you for showing me that. Thank you for showing me that I am not only willing but also able to do whatever it takes for my children and their well-being.

Thank you for fighting the divorce. Without that fight, I would have never known the level of determination I have within me. Thank you for showing me that.

Thank you for belittling me for going back to college and calling me a moron that would never amount to anything. Without your lack of support, I would have never worked as hard as I have to prove you wrong. I would not be sitting here, right now, 3 semesters away from being a REAL teacher. I would not have my 3.52 GPA or have been on the Dean's list as many times as I have been. Thank you for forcing me to give college my all and succeed in all I've done.

Thank you for my children. They are the reason I live, and as much as I wish it were not true, you gave them to me. I teach them every day to be the opposite of what you are today, so thank you for giving me an example of what I do not want my children to be. Oh, and thank you so much for continuing to use drugs so that you cannot be a part of their lives now. I'm sure they will thank you as well when they are older and understand everything a little better.

Thank you for showing me that I really am a good person. Compared to you, I am a saint. I learned that I'm not a bad person. I learned that, though I make mistakes, I have a good heart and am a good person. I learned the depth of my love for humanity and God. All because of the qualities I saw in you, most of which are not good. So thank you for that.

You made sure to destroy all the love I ever felt for you in the last 5 years we were married. But through all that destroying, I learned what qualities I wanted in a husband, none of which you possess, and that knowledge led me to find the man I WILL spend the rest of my life with. A man that is a father to my children, that loves them as if they were his own. A man that sees my worth and my flaws and loves them all. So, thank you, one last time, for giving me that.

Sincerely,

Random Tuesday Thoughts

Trudy over at Third Time's a Charm does this most weeks and I thought today would be a good day to jump right on in and give it a whirl.

I'm really beginning to think that I need to start drinking water. I say this not because it is good for you, your body needs it, blah, blah, blah. I say this because there has to be something in it. Pregnant women are popping up EVERYWHERE and it is just driving me INSANE! There just HAS to be something in the water! Don't get me wrong....I am THRILLED for them....but it just serves as a reminder of what we have been having a difficult time achieving.

On the same note...I would have been due in mere weeks....next month to be exact...if I had not had the miscarriage in June. I know when that date comes up, it is going to be a difficult one to deal with. I can only hope that I get some good news before that, because believe it or not....I will (if we get pregnant this month) be 6 weeks along on the original due date. 6 weeks is when I get an ultrasound when pregnant because of my higher risk of tubal pregnancy. I have a good feeling. I really do. But I am also at peace with it if it doesn't happen this month.

I really do not like homeschooling Big J. NOT.AT.ALL. He's a complainer. Big time. He doesn't want to do homeschooling, but will not come to the conclusion that this was not our CHOICE...it was what we had to do because of HIS actions. No matter how many times we tell him that he HAS to do this and it is his own damn fault. We regularly get into fights that usually go like this: I tell him that he needs to read the work and really try to learn it, he tells me he is, I tell him that his quiz grades are showing he is not, he gets all defensive saying I can't read his mind...I don't know what he's learning or not, I tell him to not pull that AGAIN, he stands tall (trying to make himself bigger than me) and tries to intimidate me physically to back off, I tell him to cut his shit...yell a little bit back and forth, he goes to his room and calms down, comes out and apologizes for trying to intimidate me (which NEVER works) and we talk about strategies to help him do better.........which is what I started off trying to do. That is why I don't like homeschooling him. This happens once or twice a WEEK!

I'm cold.

I need a shower but am being lazy because I have the house completely to myself.

I just got my books for 2 of my classes and am shitting bricks at the size of the novels I have to read for my English class. I have 8 novels....some are close to 900 pages long. I can only hope that we are just reading parts of these books and not the whole things.

I've been clearing out our DVR for the past weeks and a half. By clearing out, I mean watching what we have recorded and then deleting it. It has been fun! But that time is coming to an end soon. My classes start in one week. One week!

I really should have been giving my house a deep cleaning over my Christmas break (which was 5 weeks long!), but I decided that my time was better spent with my children while they were home on their break, and by doing really nothing else. No deep cleaning. No reading all the books I was putting off until break. I did read one book, but I finished that in one day. Do I feel like I've wasted my time? NO. I needed this down time. I needed time to do nothing at all. Well, at least nothing productive. Unless you count clearing out the DVR productive.

I think that is all for now. Time for a shower and some more DVR'd shows!

Man, I've been gone a while

WOW! It's been a while since I've been here. I've just been busy spending time with my kids and enjoying my time off from school. And, boy, have I been enjoying it!

Just a little update:

We finally got Big J.'s homeschool curriculum just a little before Christmas. He's been going good on it. I've been having to slow him down because he was rushing through his work and not really learning anything....which shows on his quizzes and tests (which he has been failing). Since he has slowed down and started taking his time and REALLY reading, he's done much better.

Still no pregnancy. still. We are trying to be patient, but it is so hard. It has been 7 months since the miscarriage and nothing. We are going to give it until March and then we will be getting tests run to find out if there is a problem with me or B. I really hope we don't have to resort to that. I'm hoping my mom is right. She told me, with my luck, I will get pregnant in February and be due in November, just like I was with Diva D. and Little J. I'll take it. As long as we have a healthy baby, I'll deal with having 3 birthdays in one month very close together!

I start my classes on the 19th, and I am very glad to still have a little vacation left! I looked at my degree plan and I have 3 semesters left....THAT'S IT! I will graduate May 2011 with my Bachelor's of Science in Elementary Education. Let me tell you, I never thought this day would come when I would be SO close to being finished! I feel like I've been going to college FOREVER!

Well, that's a little update. Will try to blog a little more now that the kids are back in school and I have a little more "me" time.

WOW! It's been a while!

It's been a while since I have posted anything on this blog. I just haven't felt like it have been so super busy that I just don't have the time.

What have I been super busy with? Short answer: Life.

Here comes the long answer.

School. Both mine and Big J.'s school.

My school is ending the semester soon and I have come upon the inevitable dumping of assignments that the instructor's do when they realize it is almost time to be done but they haven't covered half the stuff they should have. I LOATH this time in the semester. I always get stressed and pissy and I tend to yell a lot at the computer screen. But I am happy to say that in 2 weeks, it will be over and I have an ENTIRE month to relax. Oh, how I am looking forward to THAT!!

Big J. is still doing the homeschool thing. We still do not have a set curriculum YET, but we are waiting to see how something else (that I'd rather not talk about just yet) plays out before we spend money on a curriculum we might not even need. I have been keeping him busy with my own, custom designed assignments that directly relate to history and science so that we can say without a doubt he is doing school every week day. So far, I have taught him how to write a research paper on a historical figure (he chose Julius Caesar). A task that took almost 3 weeks! And right now he is working on writing a newspaper article about the discovery and uses of the first antibiotic--penicillin. He is really getting into this assignment, which thrills me because he is not into the whole "school/learning" thing.

Birthdays. Both Diva D.'s and Little J.'s.

Diva D.'s birthday is Nov. 11th and Little J.'s birthday is Nov. 12th. Bad timing, I know, but we get through it! *giggles* We had their birthday party--a double birthday party--on the 15th and I think I am still recovering from it! They had a great time, as we all did, and managed to get a TON of stuff (quite a bit of cash too!). The only complaint that I have is that their sperm donor bio-father showed up. I cannot stand to have him any where near me but managed to not kill him kept my mouth shut while he was there.

There are other things that have been keeping me occupied and away from blogdom, but the lazy bug is creeping in I have a major assignment to work on and need to get cracking on it!

I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving!!

Until next time.....

Hurry up and wait

Ever get that feeling?

Like you have to hurry to do stuff, but then you have to just wait for the outcome?

We have been getting that a lot. It is like deja vu over and over again.

I'm really tired of hurry up and wait.

I want a hurry up and get results NOW.

We are now 3 days into the lovely (read: sarcasm here) two week wait. I'm ready to just be pregnant and stay that way for a LONG 9 months. I'm ready to hold a sweet baby in my arms again.

On another note, we got our tickets to go see New Moon. We will be going on November 21st. I wanted to go to the midnight showing on the 20th, but the kids have school the next day and we are not going to keep them out until 2 in the morning just to watch a movie (no matter how bad I want to see it). So we are settling for a Saturday matinée. It will be me, Brilliant B., Big J., Diva D, Little J., MIL, and nephew or FIL (don't know which one, but it will be one of them). The kids are excited about it. I'm ECSTATIC about it.

Let's all hurry up and wait some more!

Just a little update on all things ME!

It has been a little while since I have updated, so I figured it was time.

***Just a caution:  I go off on a little rant after the update on Big. J. Sorry :)***

Big J. is doing better since he is not in school.  He started his credit recovery program last week and is doing well.  He says it is fairly easy and he thinks that he will get through it with no problem at all.  We are still hashing out the details about homeschooling. Making calls to insure that we are getting him into the right program.  Going over particulars with Big J's mom so that we are all on the same page.  We should be starting that by the end of this month, though. Things are starting to calm now.  Big J. will be starting some volunteer work soon, which will hopefully give him some perspective on life and how real people live it.  We hope it will help him to be able to start seeing beyond himself and look at the BIG picture of life.

We are still TTC.  I have decided that I do not want to go through a battery of tests *just* yet.  We are going to wait until March to do all of that if we do not get pregnant by then.  I am really hoping the reduced stress level will help in this area.  

It has been six months since the surgery.  One miscarriage, one possible chemical pregnancy, and months of trying have started to take it's toll on my confidence in our ability to conceive and have a healthy pregnancy.  

It seems that all the women around me are getting pregnant, and not always purposefully, and I'm stuck on the sidelines.  

Trying to be happy for them, yet breaking down on the inside.  

I wanna scream when one of the pregnant ladies bitches about being pregnant.  I want to shake them and tell them that they should be thanking their lucky stars that they are pregnant because there are others (me) that want so desperately to be in their exact shoes right then. Sick, miserable but still LOVING IT.  I would literally give my right arm to be pregnant and have a healthy pregnancy and baby.  I will welcome, with open arms, the sickness, weight gain, swelling, and fatigue that come with pregnancy.  

But I swear if I hear one more pregnant woman bitch about being pregnant I'm going postal up in this joint! 

Whew, that felt good.  

That is just a little of what is going on.  

Going to be doing a photo post soon.  Our home grown pumpkin is almost ready to be harvested and carved!

Hi, My name is Jennifer and I'm an addict

Yep, I'm coming out of the closet in my addiction.  My hubby knows now, my friends know now, my kids know....now my bloggy friends are going to know.

What is this addiction you ask???

The TWILIGHT Saga!!!! 

Yep, you read that right.  I'm one of those twenty-something-pushing-thirty ladies that are completely, head-over-heals OBSESSED with all things Twilight (and RPatz).

I have recently been adding blogs to my blog roll that are Twilight related which you can see under the heading "I follow these...".

Right now, I am waiting on Diva D. to finish up Twilight so that I can read it again.  Big J. is currently reading Eclipse and my sis-in-law has borrowed Breaking Dawn from me(which I hope she is almost done because I will need it soon).  I will NOT start reading them again until all of the books are finished by whomever is reading them right now, because I can finish one of the books in a day and will need the next book the very next day.  

You could say that since I have come to terms with this addiction, I have been feeding it more openly and without shame.  I am not ashamed to say that if RPatz (Robert Pattinson, for those that don't know who that is) were to say he wanted me now.....................I would go.  But seeing as how that will only happen in a when-hell-freezes-over type of situation, I don't see that being an issue.

AAAANNNYYY WAY, I saw this oh-so-yummy-super-sexy video of the ever delicious RPatz over at Twitarded .  I just had to share this with everyone on my blog. **warning** there is a song that goes with this.  If you do not want "Sexual Freak" blaring to all your co-workers or family, I suggest a pair of headphones or no sound at all. 

Now, tell me that was not AWESOME!  Those smoldering eyes, those lips I just want to suck off his face, that jaw that I could nibble on forever.....ahhhhh.  *fanning myself to keep from over-heating*

Well, now you all know.  Plan on seeing posts about this addiction more often now that I've "come out" about it.  I promise that not every single post will be Twilight related or RPatz related, but I will be posting about stuff.  And plan on me getting to the midnight showing of New Moon and blogging about it afterward.

But, hey, we have a few months before that happens.

AND do me a favor, please let me know if you are a TwiFreak like me....we can feed our obsession together!  And if you are a TwiFreak.....click on the button on my sidebar that says "Twilight Continues".....it is a fanfic (fan fiction) site that continues the story of the Cullens after Breaking Dawn!  

Writer's Workshop: SWEET FREEDOM!!!

It's Thursday and that means it is time for the Writer's Workshop from Mama Kat @ Mama's Losin' It.

The Prompts:
1.) What will you be doing now that the kids are back in school?
(inspired by Michelle from Honest And Truly)
2.) Things I have learned from my toddler.
(Inspired by Big Mama Cass from The World Through My Eyes).
3.) What would you put in your favorite things giveaway?
(inspired by Jill from Scary Mommy who is having a favorite things giveaway right NOW! Check it out!!)
4.) Hi, my name is ______ and I am a _______.
(inspired by Emmy from Emmy Mom One Day At A Time.)
5.) If these walls could talk...
(inspired by JennyMac from Let's Have A Cocktail)

This week I am choosing to do number one:  What will you be doing now that the kids are back in school?

Well, my kids have been back in school for the past week (see previous post here.), so I have been doing the following:

1) Sleeping in until I am ready to get up, not when the kids start making too much racket and wake me up.

2)  NOT watching cartoons all day

3)  NOT having the Spongebob theme song stuck in my head EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. (shit, there it is....I shouldn't have said anything)

4)  Having some peace and QUIET.  I forgot what it was like.  It is nice. very, very nice.

5)  Eating candy for breakfast if I so please without six little eyes (6, because 3 kids live with us and they each have 2 eyes....get it) staring at me while I enjoy my not-so-nutritious breakfast of champions.

6)  Getting ready for my college classes

7)  Going to the bookstore for above classes without 20 (ok that's an exaggeration....there is only 3....sometimes 4) kids in tow.

8)  Making threatening calls to the college because they screwed up something else without kids in earshot of my rage (ok, ok....they are not threatening....just angry).

9)  Noon-ers with the hubs (sorry...it is what has been going on....I know it is TMI).

10)  Eventually working (if they ever call me in).

11)  Watching all the kid inappropriate movies I have had on our DVR for months and months (these are just movies we don't let the kids watch).

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Well, that is what I've been up to (and as of today....going to class as well) since the kids have been back at school.

Which prompt will you choose??  Head on over and visit Mama Kat and choose your prompt!

Just a little cloudy with scattered sprinkles now! (an update on me)

You all know some of what we have been through the past few months. It was raining bad luck and hardships here so much that we were getting flooded. Problems with our oldest son, some money troubles, miscarriage and some health problems for me. 

I am so happy to say that things are turning around for us now. Now instead of being flooded, we are just being sprinkled on. Praise GOD!

We sat down and talked about the homeschooling of our oldest and decided that we could not afford for me to NOT work, so we are putting him into regular school. We called the school of a little town about 15 minutes from us and they have him on their list but it is not a guarantee he will be able to go there. We are going to talk some more about alternatives in case they do not accept him there. They do not have to because we are out-of-district for their school, so we are hoping they allow him to go there. They have an excellent school, it is SMALL and they have no gang or drug problems as that town is a farming town and a bit rural.

Our oldest son's attitude is improving by leaps and bounds. He now understands that we will not put up with the bullshit and that if he messes up, he has to deal with the consequences himself. We made it clear that we WILL NOT bail him out of trouble any longer. He knows that he only has until around May to prove that he is responsible enough to get his driver's license and if he does not SHOW us that, he has to wait until he is 18 to get it. He has been getting along with his brothers and sister so well, that they actually WANT to play with him and spend time with him. This was not the case just a few weeks ago! We are proud of him and how much he has improved in such a short time. We just pray that he continues to improve and behave! 

I found out last week (and confirmed it yesterday) that I still have a substituting job with our school district even though I did not send in my letter accepting the position for this coming school year! I am so relieved because I was NOT looking forward to searching for a job in this bad economy! I went to the substitute meeting today and learned all about their new subfinder system. AND this year I will be paid more than last year since this is my 3rd year with the district!! Hubby has been stressing hard about money and paying bills and this is going to be such a weight off of us both. We have no daycare cost this year so all the money I make will go to bills and household expenses instead of daycare! 

Some of you may remember that I was having terrible dizzy spells for about a month (maybe a little more) that started about a week after my miscarriage. Well as soon as the monthly visitor went out the door, so did the dizzy spells!! I feel amazing. Better than I have in YEARS! We are still going to take 2 cycles off from trying to conceive to let my body have a rest and maybe normal out some, but I am stoked that my health is improving! Also if we start trying again in September it means that we will have a summer baby and I will not miss any work or school!

You all remember the creepy stalker guy?  If not you can catch up here.  Well, He did it again....to another girl in the apartments where he moved to.  I don't know the exact extent of what he did or all the details.  All I do know is that it was enough that the girl called the cops and he is now in jail for at least 3 months.  I guess they figured out that he was truly a danger to women since he went all stalker-psycho on more than one woman.  I am now breathing easier knowing he is in jail for a while.

Well, that is what has been going on lately! I am just so happy that things are starting to get better.

Blah day

Have you ever just had one of those days that you wish would have never happened?

Today was one of those days.  

I had my annual "womanly" exam, which in itself is not a pleasant experience.  What made this bad was what went on AFTER I was done being poked and generally made uncomfortable.

After the exam, I went into my midwife's office and talked with her about the importance of taking my prenatal vitamins since I am trying to get pregnant (which I am doing DAILY), laying off the sodas (which I will start when I get 2 lines), and getting in for an ultrasound at 5-6 weeks (when I get a positive test).  Then she looks at my chart goes down to the weight section, gets out this little chart, looks up my BMI and proceeds to tell me that I am overweight.  

WTF???

I was under the impression from many other docs that my "healthy", "ideal" weight for my height of 5'  10 1/2" is between 165-170 pounds.  I am currently at 180 according to the scale at the doctor's office.  

Now since when is 10 pounds over "ideal" weight considered "overweight"???

Can someone tell me?

No.  I didn't think so.

AND I have lost 15 pounds in the last 6 months and am actually ok with my weight at this current moment. 

I mean, come on, I'm trying to get pregnant here.  You know....where the goal is to GAIN weight.  

That was just a major blow to my self-esteem.  I did not consider myself "overweight".  I had some pounds that ideally I would have liked to shed, but I wasn't obsessed with losing the last 10 stubborn pounds.

Hubby is going to have to do some major boosting of my self-esteem today.  But he is usually pretty damn good at doing that!  He always makes me feel beautiful!

This is what I feel like:  

My first ever blog award!!!!!

I received my very first EVER blog award!!!  Trudy over at Third Times a Charm! gave it to me and I am honored to receive it!!!  Here it is:

Now here are the rules of this cute little award:

1) Accept the award, post it on your blog together with the name of the person who has granted the award, and his or her blog link. 

2) Pass the award to 15 other blogs that you've newly discovered. (Remember to contact the bloggers to let them know they have been chosen for this award).

Find at least one, if not all, that sparks some interest and check them out, because it's always good to broaden your horizons. 

Here is a list of the blogs that I visit often and think that YOU should also check out!  You won't be sorry!  In no particular order:

1.  A Giveaway Addicted Mommy

I love to visit this blog and see what she is reviewing and giving away!!  She finds the neatest things!!  

2.  Cake Wrecks

This is exactly what you think it is.  Professional cakes gone wrong!!  This is a wonderful blog that showcases horrible cakes with some VERY funny stories and banter to go along with the wreck-iness!

3.   Girly Do's by Jenn

Jenn has some great hairstyles on her site and shows step-by-step how to do it.  I love this blog because my little girl likes some funky hairstyles and this gives me some great ideas to try out!

4.  His Boys Can Swim!

This is a secret pregnancy blog for a couple that call them selves Tarzan and Jane.  I love to read of their journey through pregnancy as first time parents.  Takes me back 11 years to my first pregnancy!  There are sweet posts, funny posts, and just flat out lovely posts there!  

5.  Kaleigh's Story

This is a heartbreaking and inspiring blog about a one pound miracle baby.  I do not want to go into a lot of detail because I could write a novel about this blog.  The best thing I can say is to go check it out for yourself.  You will not come away from that blog without being changed.  A truly heartbreaking story.

6.   Life With a Little One and More

Jenners is simply hilarious!  I love to go to her blog for a good laugh.  Some great bloggy games there too!!

7.   Mama's Losin' It

What can I say about Mama Kat?  She is funny, imaginative, and brutally honest!  I love to read her *almost* daily blog posts!  I also LOVE to do her weekly writing prompts!  Helps to get my creative juices flowing!

8.  My Charming Kids

I have just recently found this blog.  I am already loving doing the Not Me! Mondays she sponsors weekly!  So much fun!

9.   The Scattered Mind of a Tattooed Minivan Mom

This blog has truly helped me to realize that my blog is exactly that--MY BLOG.  When i first started blogging I censored myself.  I made sure I wasn't dropping and F-bombs or a S-bomb on the blogging world.  BUT I realized that by doing that, I wasn't being ME.  I sure swear. Sometimes it is the only way I can express my emotion.  I am now ME and no one else here in blog land thanks to TMVM!!!  A great read!

10.   Third Times a Charm!

I came across Trudy's blog through a writer's workshop and felt an instant connection with her.  Seems like we are both going through the same (kind-of) trying to conceive journey.  That alone links us and is allowing us to go insane in each other's cyber company!  I know that she completely understands what I'm going through, as I understand what she is going through!

11.   We found Jaryd, Jacob, and Kailyn

This is my IRL (in real life) aunt and uncle's adoption blog.  I followed daily while they were in Ukraine waiting for their little blessing to be given to them and was with them (online of course) as they made the decision to adopt not just one child, but THREE, all siblings.  I still check in on their blog to see how the adjustment is going since they have been home with my three new cousins!

12.  Wild ARS Chase

I found this blog thanks to a guest post on Jenners blog and thought he (that's right HE) was very funny!  One of the only men on my ever expanding blog roll!  Check it out.

*Note:  The rest of these are not going to be linked but are some of my favorite blogs because they are women just like me.  These women have all either had or will be having a tubal reversal and I do not want to link up their blogs without their permission.  These are all personal, revealing blogs and I wanted to make sure they were recognized as my favorites without betraying their privacy.*

13.  Trusting God

I have become close to Mrs. T throughout this journey.  I was there as she went to Mexico for her reversal and with her and supporting her as her husband did a complete 180 about having more children.  I am with her now as she is patiently waiting on God's timing for another blessing to be added to her family.

14.  Nightmare Came True/At the Hands of the Devil

This lovely lady has been to hell and back at the hands of a doctor who thought he was God and could make a decision that wasn't his to make.  This evil doctor tied my lovely friend's tubes without her consent and she is now waiting patiently for her date for her reversal to come up in June!  I was, and still am, shocked that a doctor would actually do this to a person.  My heart breaks for her and rejoices that she has seen the positive in her situation and has a wonderful outlook on life!  

15.  Bonnie's Passion

This is a truly magnificent lady with a heart of gold!  I have loved getting to know her and hear her updates.  Her son is now a Marine and I watched her blog as she went through all the emotions and excitement as her son went through boot camp.  

Thank you again Trudy for my lovely award!!!  

Happy Freaking Birthday to me

Well, it is my birthday today and I am NOT having a good one.  I have a sick 5 year old that is puking about every thirty minutes.  YIPEE.  NOT!

This has happened every year for about the last 4 years.  A sick kid ON MY BIRTHDAY! 

I am not going to celebrate my birthday anymore.  We are just going to skip it.  I'll just stay 28 forever. K?

Random facts about me.

1. I am terrified of moths. And I mean TERRIFIED, like going into panic mode when I see one. Don't know why, just am and is something I just can't seem to get over.

2. I am afraid that I am not a good enough mother to my kids and they will grow up to hate me.

3. I am really a shy person. You can't tell from my actions, but I get to the point to almost having panic attacks in new situations.

4. I am scared of my upcoming surgery. I am terrified that I will get there and something will go wrong. But I will not let the fear stop me.

5. I dance and sing when I am by myself, but will not do it when there are people around. 

6. I love pink. I always used to hate it, but am secretly in love with the color!!

7. I am looking forward to finishing college but don't know if I am ready to be done. Does that make sense?

8. I think I will make a good teacher someday.

9. I don't like teenagers these days. They are rude and assholes. There I said it.

10. I am a computer addict. I have to be careful to not spend too much time on the computer.

11. I think that I could do a better job than some of my instructors that I have had. They were just morons.

12. I don't have any friends in my town. I find it hard to make friends at work or at school because I have no time to really hang out with anyone. I hang out with my family and my in-laws. And I am ok with it.

13. I hate cleaning. Always have, always will. Think it goes back to my childhood, when me and my sis HAD to clean the whole house. Just us. No adult help.

14. I love kids. I would have 20 if I could. That is why I want to be a teacher. **No, we will not be having 20 kids. One or two more (I want 2 more hubby only wants on more)**

15. I think that my mom is extremely unhappy in her marriage and is only staying in it so she won't be alone, doesn't want to be divorced again, and she enjoys the money too much. 

16. I don't like my stepdad. Never have. Never will. He's an ass.

17. I like chocolate. I could eat it all day, everyday.

18. I am scared that I will fail at everything I do and therefore have become a chronic overachiever.

19. I am a reality TV junkie. I love watching VH1 during the day because they have the BEST funny reality shows EVER!

20. I watch shows like Nanny 911, Wife Swap, and Tool Academy to make myself feel better about my family! Those people make my family look like angels!

21. I secretly wish that I was married to Johnny Depp, or at least could have his baby. LOL!!!!! He's so hot!!!!!!!!

22. When I first starting talking to my husband, I blew him off. Then a few months later I started to talk to him again and a few months after that we started dating and a few months after that, we were married. Who knew!!!!

23. I met my husband online. Bet you didn't know that!

24. I cannot imagine my life without my husband and the boys. 

25. My dog stinks. Even after a bath, he stinks. We have to take him to get groomed and they have to use the shampoo they use on animals that get sprayed by skunks to get rid of the smell. And that only lasts a few weeks. It is gross. But I love my retardo dog.